Why Do You Say "Yes", When You Want To Say "No"... and When You Say "No" Why Do You Feel Guilty!

Overview:

Most of the time we say “yes” because we think or feel it's the right thing to do. But forcing ourselves to do things that we don’t have the time, energy, or money to do, that doesn’t align with our values or priorities, or that we simply don’t want to do, leads to issues and problems in our lives both at home and in the workplace.

What happens when you say Yes, but really want to say No:

• You think no one else will do it, so you think you have to

• You want people to think you’re a nice person or a good team player

• You feel resentful, angry or mad

• You feel unappreciated

• Your relationship with the other person or group is strained

• You’re overworked and overtired

• You don’t have time and resources for your goals, priorities, or you

Learning to say “No” starts with: Authenticity and Mindful Communication

This two (2) hour coaching session focuses on the latest Values In Action (VIA) research and trends in character strength leadership, and identifying the importance authenticity and mindful communication has or plays in leadership for managers and supervisors.

Through the lens of authenticity, you will gain an understanding of the force this character strength has on personal well-being and leadership performance, the hurdles and barriers/force-fields that inhibit people from being their authentic selves and discover a model to identify and address inauthentic performances.

This coaching session also focuses on how mindfulness and character strengths practices can enhance your everyday communications to create more meaningful experiences and deeper connections with others. In this session, you will learn how to actively bring forth proactive mindful listening and speaking communication skills and strategies, and not be drawn into dysfunctional social interactions and power games which manipulate you into saying “Yes”, when you want to say “No”.

With your personalized Character Strengths Report, you will discover how to activate your mindfulness skills to empower greater interpersonal awareness and action toward:

• enhancing well-being

• managing problems

• improving relationships

• finding personal and professional success

In and Out of The Garbage Can... "I'm Ok - I'm Not Ok!" - Overview

This coaching session is designed to identify which Life Position you are in and how to stay out of the "Garbage Can" with family, friends, colleagues, and co-workers.

Life Positions are a core concept that reflects one's attitudes and feelings toward themselves and others. There are four basic life positions, each representing a different combination of self-perception and the perception of others. The positions are:

• "I'm OK – You're OK" (positive toward self and others)

• "I'm OK – You're Not OK" (positive toward self, negative toward others)

• "I'm Not OK – You're OK" (negative toward self, positive toward others)

• "I'm Not OK – You're Not OK" (negative toward self and others)

Life Positions are the basic beliefs and feelings that we hold about ourselves and others, and which are used to justify our decisions and behaviors.

Our Life Positions are shaped by our early life experiences, and these positions consist of whether we view ourselves and others as “OK” or “not OK”.

Switching back and forth from "Okness" to "Not Okness", in terms of how you feel about yourself and how you feel about others, is likened to being "in and out of the garbage can" and creates problematic social interaction with others.

Coaching Session Overview: Social Emotional Intelligence

Engaging with others requires the application of self-regulation of social and emotional intelligence. Social Emotional Intelligence (SEI) is the ability to know oneself and to know others, to manage both your own emotions and understand the emotions of people around you. There are five key elements to SEI: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. In this coaching session, you will learn what the character strength of Social Emotional Intelligence is, how to apply it, and how to avoid communication traps and going "in and out of the garbage can". Utilizing presentations and engaging hands-on skill/practice, these sessions will empower you to be more effective in your communications with others and will help you increase your SEI awareness and leverage social emotional intelligence character strengths effectively.

Objectives:

• Develop knowledge and competency for understanding the five stages of social emotional intelligence and employ clear definitions and relevance of each stage

• Discuss and introduce concepts of Social Emotional Intelligence at the personal individual level and how this can be applied to all levels of social interaction inside and outside the workplace.

• Gain a greater understanding of how personal behaviors and character strength communication styles affect workplace interactions. Discuss various communication styles and how to build skills through more effective collaboration.

• Identify ways to improve Social Emotional Intelligence in the workplace overall, and learn ways to avoid the most common and most painful mistakes around underuse and overuse of social emotional intelligence.
  

If It Weren't For You...!" Life Games and ICONS - Overview

Games & Gameology

This coaching package provides a framework for understanding how to identify life games and which ones you are in. As well as exploring their hidden meanings and how they are used. Coaching sessions will focus on how we communicate and relate to others, as well as how to navigate manipulative social situations.

You will complete a personal VIA Character Strength Assessment (Survey/Profile), which will help you recognize and assess your own negotiating style and how your style can positively or negatively influence family, friends, and co-workers. You will acquire an understanding of the relationship character strengths play with improving interpersonal communications and in motivating yourself and others to succeed/perform.

Objectives:

• Understand the framework of Identifying Communications of Negotiating Strategies (ICONS) as an interpersonal relationship tool/model

• Learn your Top 5 Character Strengths that ICONS may be demonstrated through and learn how to apply these character strengths

• Increase awareness and learn how to identify character strengths in others

• Explore ways to activate character strengths in oneself and others across all levels of your life journey